Jerry Seinfeld

Seeing as we are in the city of Jerry Seinfeld, the undisputed king of observational comedy, here are some observations of mine...none of them are funny by the by...I should stick to statistics.

1) American women have larger breasts than Australian women...too much chicken...or are they all fakies? This finding necessitates a more thorough investigation.

2) New Yorkers are full of self-importance...in the nicest way. You would think that living in a city of 8,363,710 would give you a sense of the insignificance of an individual life which would hopefully lead to some sort of existential angst, the resolution of which might result in a healthy ego. However it seems to do the opposite. It is almost as if New Yorkers rage against this threatening force and enter into an unending egomaniacal cage match of death to win the prize of...christ knows what...

3) High population density + economic prosperity + capitalism = Shit-hot cheap food & clothes.

4) Running/Jogging is highly correlated with neuroticism

5) Ability to understand sarcasm is inversely correlated with how seriously a person takes themselves.

6) Smiling/talking to strangers is illegal in the state of New York and anyone caught in the act will be immediately deported to Ellis Island to receive intensive scowling re-conditioning.

Cam